Un-wanted

Please please read this...it's so heartbreakingly good!!

Adorned

"Now I am Yours and You are mine
And nothing now can break the bonds of love
We are joined together now"

I am at the beginning of a new season. I love new seasons because I get take all the past lessons I have learned and apply them to the new challenges that God brings my way.  This semester I will be doing an internship at a family counseling center.  Honestly, I was really nervous about this because I knew I would see children and families who are struggling.  If you know me, you know I have a very compassionate heart (aka...I cry a lot when I see hurting people).  I kept asking God if I was really able to handle seeing all that I will see. I doubted my own ability to handle having my heart broken everyday by the situations I see.

To my questioning God gently responded that I am His and He is mine. (see quoted lyric above ;)) This means that in everything I see, He will be right next to me holding me. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” Isaiah 30:21 He will never allow me to see more than I handle.  God even challenged me to look for Him in every situation.  I think this will cause me to have a completely different outlook on situations that look harsh from my normal point of view, and to see things from God's perspective.

This new perspective that I will hopefully gain will be beneficial in whatever God has for me in the future.  For the direction in which my life is headed, it seems that seeing hurting people will likely be part of it (and I secretly really hope it does).  And again, at realizing this my first response is to fear.  And yet again, God gently challenges me.  Because my life is Jesus' now, I am to be His hand and feet.  Well, Jesus loved the hurting, embraced them, and administered healing.  If I chose not to go where Jesus is calling me, then my relationship with Him will suffer. I won't be able to see Him and learn about Him the way He desires for me to.  So, this is me stepping forward into brokenness looking for Jesus, dying to myself, and allowing Him to make my ugly heart something beautiful.  It will not be an easy road , but I know that as I walk, I will fall even more in love with Him as I learn more about His love for sinners, of which I am the worst (1 Tim. 1:15).

“I, the LORD, have called you in righteousness;
   I will take hold of your hand.
 I will keep you and will make you
   to be a covenant for the people
   and a light for the Gentiles,
   to open eyes that are blind,
   to free captives from prison
   and to release from the dungeon 

   those who sit in darkness. 

       Isaiah 42:6-7