WAIT
By Russell Kelfer
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate...
and the Master so gently said, "Wait."
"Wait? You say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.
My future and all to which I relate
hangs in the balance and you tell me to wait?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign.
Or even a 'no,' to which I'll resign.
You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
as my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
and grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting...for what?"
He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine...
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.
I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.
You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
you'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
when darkness and silence are all you can see.
You'd never experience the fullness of love
when the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort late into the night,
the faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.
You'd never know should your pain quickly flee,
what it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
but oh, the loss if I lost what I'm doing in you.
So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still "WAIT."
Lately I have been thinking about perfection and waiting, Both separately and how they are related.
Waiting has taken on a new meaning to me in the last year. Not only in things happening in my world, but in the lives of people around me. It has been my observation that everyone is waiting for something.
I have personally been waiting for a day when me education will be complete and I can go do something more purposeful for orphans. If you have been following my blog or know me very at all, you may have noticed my frustration with this area, but like always God has been faithful in calming my heart. I am taking Perspectives (a class about God's view of the world). One week the speaker talked about how missions is where we are at and God has put us where we are for a reason. On the surface this does not seem earth shattering, but to me-"light bulb". I had been so focused on orphan work that I could do overseas and what that looks like in my future that I totally missed the opportunities God had given me here. I chose to think that my plans were better and that God did not know what He was doing. I would not advise this thinking because you will be unhappy and completely bashing the Creator of the universe. The good news is, He was faithful, because that is the God I serve. So although I have my moments of frustration, Jesus brings me back and shows me the wonderful things that are happening here in Ames, Iowa that I get to be a part of.
Another thing I have been learning is the idea of perfection. Sometimes I get fed up with the fact that I am indeed a sinner. I feel like I cannot do anything right and continually mess things up. But then out of no where God comes in and shows His glory in something I did. I have to stand there in awe of how He could have possibly used me to glorify Himself (trust me this is not always/ever an easy task). Shortly after this moment of awe, I soon mess up. This is the pattern of my life. BUT...that is what Jesus died for. He loved me enough to lay down His life, so that I don't have to live in pain, selfishness, and darkness.
So...I am a work in progress. I have come to term with the fact that I am not perfect, nor will I ever be. But God wants me to strive for perfection. Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. Matthew 5:48 He knows I will fail, but He wants me to try anyway. As I attempt, I become more like Jesus and that brings me the greatest joy.
So I wait for the day when I will be done with my education and I will get to do something a little more exciting with orphans. I will also wait for the day when I get to heaven and see the perfect Creator and I no longer have to struggle with sin. Through the waiting I am determined to see God in everything, no matter where I am at. I will try my hardest to be like Jesus because that is what having a relationship with Him is all about.
